Anger Management Counselling in Calgary
Correcting the roots of anger problems.
Anger management is a start, but we go far deeper then the simple management of anger. We work with anger at the primary emotion level; helping our clients get in touch with the core of what their emotions are trying to tell them and then teaching them how to respond effectively to such
While few people enjoy feeling anger, anger is a valuable emotion that lets us know we are experiencing some kind of real or perceived harm and need to address the situation.
If our parental figures were unable to manage anger, modeled poor communication and unhealthy conflict resolution skills, it's only natural we would also learn to use yelling, rage and smashing things to protect ourselves where we lack the skills to more effectively address the situation.
So, if simple techniques of anger management haven't worked, perhaps Henze & Associates counselling services for anger and rage recovery can help you finally regain real control.
Anger management is a good start:
Improperly managed emotion of any sort can create problems in our relationships with other people; unmanaged anger is no exception. The starting point of anger management counselling is to learn to identify the internal signals our mind, body and emotions are sending to us and then keep them under control using techniques such as:
- Pre-framing techniques: Situations where anger management is likely to be an issue are nothing if not predictable. We help set our clients up for success with their anger issues by helping them mentally rehearse those situations. Our clients visualize their way through the rage triggering elements of the event - mentally preparing to respond in a productive and calm manner.
- Relaxation techniques: In difficult situations, we help our clients develop skills of relaxation to help reduce tension in the body. Those techniques include distraction, redirecting focus, simple distraction and deep breathing techniques that help to divert attention and reduce anger.
- Reframing techniques: In anger management counselling, our clients learn how to identify distortions of thought, dysfunctional beliefs about the motives of others and fixations on rules or standards that lead to difficulties managing anger. Then, we help them track and replace those thoughts and beliefs with more balanced views of the situation.
- Time-out techniques: Everyone has a breaking point. Learning where that breaking point is, developing an internal set of gauges that warn us in advance, gaining a set of skills for calling a time out and learning how to escape situations before those gauges of anger redline is an essential component of effective anger management counselling.
- Avoiding our past: When we fail to address our past, experiences such as abuse, neglect, abandonment, bullying and other traumatic experiences can set us up for unmanageable anger. Resolving those issues from our past and dealing with the ways our parents modeled life to us can help us to see the present through different lenses and significantly eliminate triggers for anger.
- Avoiding our present: Unresolved present day problems in areas like employment, financial problems, debt and other general life issues can leave us anxious, depressed and irritable. We help our clients address both the blockages to taking ownership of those life issues and in learning the skills to make life work.
- Avoiding relationship issues: Learning and practicing effective communication skills and discovering how to successfully resolve conflict without resorting to anger are two key ways we help our clients to develop new patterns of dealing with relational issues as they come. Anger management issues in relationship usually result from a lack of skills at expressing yourself and negotiating compromise, which then causes a build up of anger. We help our clients and, where possible, their partners develop and practice skills to achieve the healthy relationships that can eliminate unhealthy and unmanageable anger.
But, anger management is not enough:
Anger is a secondary emotion - it always results from other, more core, emotions such as guilt, shame, fear, hurt or abandonment. People overreact in anger because of lack of awareness of, or discomfort with addressing those primary emotions. Our clients learn how to identify primary emotions, understand their meaning and then come to understand the changes that may need to be made in their lives such that unmanageable anger is generated much less often.
Life changes instead of anger management:
Life is stressful. But, sometimes we make life a lot more stressful then it needs to be which can lead to problems managing anger. Some of the ways we generate that stress include:
A spiritual perspective on unhealthy anger:
Issues of anger management and patterns of guilt, shame and fear are innately linked with each other and with elements of faith and spirituality. In Calgary and, through modern technology, around the world, Henze and Associates offers is a unique faith based layer of treatment that adapts to your individual faith perspective and helps your faith to begin to work to free you from the underlying issues that cause unhealthy anger.
We correct the roots of communication and anger problems:
Adult anger is not a mystery and you don't have to settle for simple management of it. Anger management issues are almost always caused by childhood pain and the failure of parental figures to teach effective communication and general life skills. We don't just fix the symptom of improperly managed anger, we go right to the root and address the causes of the anger so you can walk free of unhealthy patterns of anger.
So, if you're tired of Band-Aids and want something far beyond simple anger management counselling, then please contact us today and see what the therapists at Henze & Associates can do for you.
Learn more about our unique faith based perspective here.